47. CINCINNATI FLOWER SHOW & CINCINNATI MAY FESTIVAL

Cincinnati, Ohio

4/24/2010

Shame on you, Patricia! We cut you some slack back when you put the Cleveland Museum of Art and the Cleveland Botanical Garden in one entry because they’re both museums and right across the street from each other. However, the Cincinnati Flower Show and the Cincinnati May Festival are two completely different events at two completely different times (April and May) that have no connection whatsoever (the May Festival is a series of classical music concerts). In fact, the Cincinnati Flower Show isn’t even really in Cincinnati – it’s about twenty minutes north in Symmes Township. So how can you justify combining these two events into one? Was “1002 Places (Many of Which are Actually Events and not Really Places, You Know, Like, Technically) to See Before You Die” not a catchy enough title? Ok, Patricia. We’ll play your sick, sick game. But one rule: When you cheat and put two places in one entry, we get to pick just one and cross it off our list. Ah ha! The Cincinnati Flower Show runs through Laura’s birthday. Happy birthday, honey. Let’s look at some flowers.

As mentioned above, the Cincinnati Flower Show is actually in Symmes Township. If you don’t know what a township is you shouldn’t have fallen asleep in my government class last week. I think it helped the ambience of the show taking place in a more suburban environment than if it had been smack in the middle of a huge city. I understand that the show was originally in Cincinnati proper, and only recently moved. I’d be interested to hear how that has affected the show.

First of all, we were very impressed with the organization of the event. It was clear that not only had Symmes Township shut down for this event, but nobody seemed to mind. In fact, the place was teeming with local volunteers who were very friendly and helpful. Parking at huge events like this can be a nightmare, but everything was clearly planned by the township to run as smoothly as possible. I got the distinct impression that this community was taking great pride in having the honor of hosting the show – it was a very contagious attitude.

The show itself was interesting, although much smaller than we imagined. The Cincinnati Flower Show is the only flower show in North America approved by the British Horticultural Society, and the proof is in the quality of the displays rather than the quantity. I suppose we should have expected that. If this show is so prestigious only the best of the best are going to be able to get in. I guess we just assumed it would be larger nonetheless. All of the displays were contained within two large tents. It didn’t take long to see everything. Most of the rest of the grounds were dedicated to your typical festival hawkers – but for the most part they were selling gardening stuff, so at least it was relevant to the event.

This particular day was a part of “Children’s Weekend.” There was a tent set up with activities and events for children. Daniel was a little too young for the hands-on activities, but he was fascinated by the alpacas, cows and sheep in the petting zoo – although he was a little wary. He much preferred the chickens.

We really did like the children’s area. There were a lot of activities and crafts – all of which were free. Daniel did get a little flower in a basket, which is now safely planted in our patio. There was no “ice cream man” trying to guilt parents into buying things. I can imagine that a parent of a four-year old would really appreciate that.

All in all, we enjoyed the show. Both Laura and I had to admit that we’re just not going to get that excited about a flower show – so there was no way it was going to change our lives. But it was an enjoyable afternoon in a casual atmosphere, where it was obvious the people involved cared about what they were doing and what an event like this can do for their community.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to try to bake a birthday cake. Anyone know how to turn on the oven?

46. PARKE COUNTY

Parke County, Indiana

4/10/2010

We spent our second night at the same Super 8, before making the long trek home. We were soon back in Indiana and the eastern time zone. More Quantum Leap noises.

To break up the trip home we took a detour through Parke County, Indiana – the self-appointed covered bridge capital of the world. The most bustling town in Parke County is Rockville. That aside, when we arrived, it was virtually deserted. Nevertheless, it has two visitor’s centers and a covered bridge museum. That would have been great, except all three were closed. We found that odd on a Saturday afternoon in the spring – a perfect time to check out the bridges. (Another dying small town?) Luckily I had written to them before we took the trip so I had already been sent some information and had a covered bridge map to help us find them.

We decided to eat lunch in town at a place called Weber’s. Like everywhere else, it was empty. The food was your typical greasy spoon. Right before we left a man and a woman entered. The woman asked me, “Well, is this where we’re supposed to be?” I answered, “I don’t know. Where are you trying to go?” She ignored me and said to her husband, “I guess this is it.” The waitress seated them, asked how they were, and the woman said, “I’m alive, aren’t I?” We left.

The only other open business appeared to be “Aunt Patty’s Antiques” which we stopped into. It was actually a pretty nice antique store. Laura found a big, stuffed Winnie-the-Pooh for Daniel, but there was no price tag. When she asked about it, the woman running the store tried to call the seller. She got an answering machine. She then called again, complaining that the seller was behind in her rent. Suddenly, the seller called back. The seller wanted $25 for the Winnie-the-Pooh and a cookie jar. She wouldn’t sell them separately. The woman running the store said, “That’s too expensive, if you ask me.” We agreed.

Leaving town we decided it was time to see the covered bridges. Using the map that had been mailed to me, we took one of the color-coded routes. The map was stylized and not very helpful. Tip for mapmakers: Make the roads in your map just like the roads in real life. That would help. Luckily there were color-coded signs along the routes – until you got to a big intersection. Then you had to guess. Usually we guessed wrong, but since the map didn’t include most of the intersecting roads it was hard to figure out where we had gone wrong. We pretty much followed the route as best we could, but for all our driving we only saw one covered bridge.

The rest of our trip home was uneventful. We did stop for ice cream and gave Daniel his first ice cream cone. He had been such a good boy, putting up with all the traveling, he deserved it.

Eventually he started to get lonely in the back all by himself, so I went into the backseat and played with him and just looked at him. I just love looking at him. Sometimes I don't do that enough when we're at home.

Before long, we saw the skyline of Columbus up ahead. It looks so small to us now.

P.S. FROM LAURA:

I did not like driving around for an hour just to see two covered bridges. On a side note, I’m so glad that our little boy travels well. After six hours strapped in a car seat, I would be a screaming maniac. I did find that if you leave your car radio on perpetual scan, it can drive your husband up the wall. Just a little tip for all those traveling wives who want to get back at their husbands who will yell Kentuckyyyyyyyy for hours and hours….

45. ARUN’S

Chicago, Illinois

4/9/2010

Arun’s is a Thai restaurant that has no set menu. What you get is a twelve course “tasting menu” designed by the chef each night for a fixed price. All through Lent we dreamed about this meal. When we arrived we took advantage of the valet parking and were pretty much treated like royalty the whole evening.

Once we were seated we realized we had left the baby formula in the car, so I ran out to try to find the valet. He had parked our car just down the street and when he saw me he seemed very concerned that he had done something wrong. I tried to explain that I had forgotten something in the car, but he kept saying things like “Your car is safe. I’ll watch it all night. You don’t have to worry.” I think he had gotten himself so worried when he saw me exit the restaurant that he got himself into a kind of a panic. He wasn’t annoying or anything. He just really wanted me to be happy and he obviously took his job very seriously.

Once I returned everything ran smoothly. All of the food was exquisite. Many of the flavors I couldn’t really identify, so I really felt like I was experiencing something truly exotic. Each course was small, but remember: there were twelve courses. They added up fast. By the end it was perfect. We weren’t hungry, we weren’t stuffed. We were completely satisfied. Apparently, Arun Sampanthavivat is considered as much an artist with food as he is a chef. I think understand that now.

Is it worth $85 a person? Is anything? Yes, it was very expensive, but it was nice knowing exactly how much it was going to cost in advance. There’s nothing worse that eating a restaurant and then getting a surprisingly-high bill. (Story Inn, anyone?) Since this trip had been planned for months I had already budgeted the bill and had gone through my “buyer’s remorse” a long time ago. Definitely a once in a lifetime experience. Hey, you can’t eat at Wendy’s every night.

P.S. FROM LAURA:

I love really spicy food, so I didn't mind ordering my courses with the spicy option. However, my mouth was on fire after the first bite. And I mean it was so hot, I wondered if my tongue was still in existence. After the second spicy course, I finally asked them to tone it down. There was no way I could physically make it through the rest of the courses, let alone enjoy them. Don't get me wrong, the food was really good, but if you can’t taste anything except hot flames, it’s time to throw in the towel. What good is an expensive meal if you can’t taste it, let alone enjoy, any of it? So if you are going to request the spicy courses, be warned. Bring your own fire extinguisher. On a positive note the atmosphere was warm, the service was prompt, and the male waiters were cute.

44. MUSEUM CAMPUS

Chicago, Illinois

4/9/2010

The Museum Campus is three museums in the same complex – the Field Museum of Natural History, the Shedd Aquarium and the Adler Planetarium. Admission to all three will cost one person $71.95, so use your Go Chicago Card, you fool!

It was only supposed to take us fifteen minutes to drive from Superdawg to the campus, but on the way we got our first real taste of the infamous Chicago traffic. It took us about two hours, which really ate into our time, so we had to be frugal.

We started at the Field Museum. A couple of days before visiting we rented a cheesy horror movie called The Relic which takes place in the Field Museum. Monster rampages through the exhibits. That kind of thing. So we spent a lot of time joking about how well they cleaned up the museum from the monster attack.

The pride of the museum is Sue – the world’s most complete Tyrannosaurus Rex – sadly destroyed by the monster and by a giant fireball, but painstakingly reconstructed for our visit.

We spent most of our visit in an exhibit about Egyptian mummies, but Daniel’s favorite was definitely the gorilla on display. Once we told him it was a gorilla he kept saying “guh-ill-ah” and waving at it.

Of all the museums, the Field was the one we wished we had more time to explore. What surprised us the most was how childlike it was – and I mean that in a positive way. It was a very fun and interactive place that was aimed at making science fun and exciting to young people. We would like to return there when Daniel is older.

Our next stop was the Adler Planetarium, which we reached by taking a short walk along Lake Michigan’s shoreline – quickly becoming my favorite body of water. Unfortunately, the planetarium was closing early that day so we didn’t have time to actually go to any of the planetarium shows. (NOTE: They charge extra for the planetarium shows besides general admission, unless you have a Go Chicago Card, in which case you can attend TWO for free. Too bad we missed them, but at least we didn’t pay for them.) We did have time to visit most of the exhibits, which were mostly interactive displays aimed at children. A large bulk of the museum was dedicated to the 40th anniversary of the ill-fated Apollo 13 mission. Jim Lovell is one of my personal heroes, so Laura had to listen patiently while I went on and on about him. She lovingly resisted the urge to hit me over the head with a hammer.

Of the three museums, we were the least impressed with the planetarium, but I feel badly casting judgment since we didn’t actually experience the planetarium shows themselves, which to me was the whole point of visiting there in the first place. Darn you, Chicago traffic!

Our last stop – and hands down the best – was the Shedd Aquarium. Until recently the largest aquarium in the world, this place is filled with exotic fish and other aquatic life from all over the world. Even though it is huge, it is very easy to navigate. Whoever designed it needs to build an art museum.

The best part of the aquarium is the lower level where you can see sharks, beluga whales, and other large creatures in deep water. Daniel was fascinated by everything. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so excited. One section of the aquarium is a little play area where kids can play in the water and touch barnacles and sea shells. Daniel was in hog heaven, splashing and playing. We made sure before we left to wave at Granddad, an Australian lungfish and the oldest fish in captivity in the world.

On our way back to the car we were met by a toothless man giving out copies of The Onion. He explained that he was taking donations for the homeless. I gave him the change I had in my pocket, but he said he didn’t want my change. I was a little confused, until it became obvious that he wanted more. He got kind of mad and said, “I don’t want your change. I could give YOU change. You’ve obviously never been homeless.” I do have compassion and I figure the homeless standard of living is pretty high in Chicago, but I didn’t realize there was a minimum required donation. What did he want? My credit card number? Sheesh. Being accosted by a Chicago panhandler: Check that one off the life list.

P.S. FROM LAURA:

I greatly enjoyed watching my little son playing in the water at the Shedd Aquarium, until I noticed another little boy farther down, spitting in the pools. The Egyptian Mummy exhibit at the Field Museum was rather impressive. Egyptian history has been an interest of mine, so I wanted to visit that particular section. It was very hands-on. They even had a few mummies on exhibit, which is rather rare as exhibits go. It was like visiting a little bit of Egypt. Though if you think about it, how enjoyable should the experience be when you are staring at some mummified corpses? I wish that we had more time to explore this museum. (It was rather odd that they had a McDonalds located on the ground level next to the Mummy Exhibit.) I found Adler Planetarium very uninteresting and we walked far too long to get there. There were no hot dog stands or bathrooms in between. I complained the whole time---just ask my husband. It was also odd seeing two people smoking a hookah outside the building. I guess in Chicago, anything goes.

43. SUPERDAWG

Chicago, Illinois

4/9/2010

Chicago is not only the birthplace of deep-dish pizza, but of the hot dog. Superdawg is not the inventor of the hot dog, but certainly one of its weirder proponents – with a giant anthropomorphized hot dog in a Tarzan loin cloth beckoning passing drivers. The restaurant is a drive-in, which gives it an old-time feel. They do have a dining room, but we thought it would be more fun to be authentic and eat in the car. Our waitress seemed puzzled by our Ohio license plates, so it looks like tourists haven’t invaded and taken over quite yet. The Superdawg itself? It was a hot dog. What more can I say?

P.S. FROM LAURA:

I consider myself a connoisseur of hot dogs, as I seem to crave them during my pregnancies. I have eaten a lot of hot dogs in the past couple years, more than I care to think about. Frankly, I didn’t think this hot dog was that impressive. I was expecting more. I’d rather have some chess pie.

42. FRANK LLOYD WRIGHT HOME AND STUDIO

Oak Park, Illinois

4/9/2010

Although not in Chicago, but in nearby Oak Park, the Frank Lloyd Wright Home and Studio is included on the Go Chicago Card, so we drove over there to take a tour.

Although we’ve heard of Frank Lloyd Wright, neither Laura nor I really knew anything about him. Lucky for us, the Frank Lloyd Wright Home and Studio is the beginning of the Wright “pilgrimage” (Schultz’ words) since it was his first home he built when just 22 and starting his career. For two people completely ignorant of Wright’s influence, it was a great introduction. He built the house before he developed his signature prairie-style, yet he added on to it throughout the years as he grew as an artist. Because of this, as you travel through the house you quickly see the evolution of a genius in a very concrete way.

Daniel had fun on the tour, as he made friends with a very nice, elderly English lady who cooed over him the entire time. Speaking of Daniel, he was exceptionally well-behaved during the whole tour. We could tell the guides were nervous that he would be disruptive – and so were we – but he made us proud.

41. CHICAGO’S ARCHITECTURE

Chicago, Illinois

4/9/2010

After a very full day we spent the night in a Super 8 in a town called East Hazel Crest – about a half hour outside Chicago. It was by far the cheapest in the area, and it was actually pretty nice. When we got up in the morning for the breakfast there was another guy eating there too, who kept exclaiming odd things like “CBS.COM IS AN AFFLIATION OF CBS BROADCASTING!” to no one in particular.

With our bellies full we drove back into Chicago and locked the GPS into a course for the Willis Tower (née the Sears Tower). As we entered the sector of town dominated by these massive skyscrapers the GPS flipped its electronic lid. Laura and I guessed that the buildings were so high that they were blocking the satellite signals. We weren’t too worried though. Since the Willis Tower is the tallest building in the western hemisphere it was pretty hard to lose sight of and we made it there without any trouble.

We wound up arriving at the Tower about 20 minutes before it was scheduled to open to visitors and there was already a bit of a line. We stood there patiently, listening to these guys in front of us talk excitedly about Pokémon.

Eventually, we were let in and were led to the ticket desk. It is here that I should mention we didn’t need to buy tickets. Before going on the trip we purchased two “Go Chicago Cards,” which were mailed to our home. You pay a flat fee for the cards and then you can use them for free admission to pretty much all the major landmarks in Chicago. The trick is careful planning, since they are only valid for a set number of days. We bought 1-day cards, and we wound up saving about $70, so you can save a lot of money if you make a lot of use of the cards.

After the ticket desk we were led through security – which is just like you’d find at an airport. Lucky me, I set off the metal detector and I had to be pulled aside. I don’t carry any machetes or anything, but I always seem to set those things off. Finding nothing, I was released and send on my merry way.

We were then led to this big elevator which shot us up 1353 feet. All the while, a video screen presented images of the Taj Mahal, the Eiffel Tower, and other famous buildings as we ascended past their heights. It’s a pretty effective one-minute presentation.

Once leaving the elevator we were treated to an almost unbelievable panorama of not only Chicago’s great architecture, but parts of Michigan, Indiana, and Wisconsin. I was especially proud of Laura, who is deathly afraid of heights, who took it all in stride. She will never in her life be this high off the ground, so talk about facing your fears head on!

Laura did draw the line at standing in “The Ledge” – a series of transparent boxes jutting out from the building. I have to admit, it was terrifying making that first step, and I took Daniel with me – which probably disqualifies me for the “Daddy of the Year” award. Looking down, the mind can’t really take in the enormity of the drop, and I suddenly didn’t feel like I was that high off the ground at all. Very strange sensation.

P.S. FROM LAURA:

I hate heights. I thought I was going to die. It isn’t so bad until you step off the elevator, and you can feel the building move. And no, I am NOT standing on “The Ledge”. I’ve already had my near-death experience by driving through downtown Chicago. There was no thrill in it for me, except cold, cold shivers running down my spine. My men enjoyed themselves, so that’s all that counts. If you are afraid of heights, too, try not to think about the fact that you are trillions of feet off the ground, and focus on happy thoughts, like how you are going to murder your husband for dragging you there.

40. THE ART INSTITUTE OF CHICAGO

Chicago, Illinois

4/8/2010

Walking back through the Magnificent Mile, over the river and past Millennium Park again we reached the imposing Art Institute of Chicago – one of the largest art collections in the world. By now you should know that when I hear “large” and “art collections” I get nervous, but this place puts the Detroit Institute of the Arts to shame.

Cheapskate that I am, I used the Art Institute as the “anchor” for planning the whole trip. Admission is $18 a person – unless you are smart and go on Thursday night from 5:00pm – 8:00pm. Then it’s free! So, naturally, I planned our first night in Chicago to be on a Thursday. That’s $36 more for baby formula! Hooray!

We had one slice of pizza left from dinner, but they wouldn’t let us take it into the museum, so we had to anger the pizza gods by throwing it away. Then we entered the labyrinth. At one point, Laura asked a museum employee where the nearest bathroom was. The woman replied, “I think to get to the closest one from here you need to go down two floors at these stairs. Then you need to walk straight through a bunch of the exhibit rooms and I think you’ll find a bathroom there.” Really? Try saying something like that to a pregnant woman and see how long you live.

I really do try at these museums, and I do my homework. I always try to find out what the most impressive pieces are since I can make sure we try to see them. The paintings in question here are A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte, Nighthawks, and American Gothic – all tragically parodied to the point that the incredible originals are almost impossible to take seriously. Nevertheless, I want to see them. Should be simple, right? I have a map. Great. All the rooms are numbered. Great. Except the numbers don’t seen to have any real logic behind them. Not so great.

Ok. Let’s look for A Sunday Afternoon. According to the map, it should be right here. In fact, I have frustratingly returned to this room a couple of times. Oh! Now I see. Someone built a giant column blocking a small passageway that leads to the painting. That’s not the painting’s fault though. It is an amazing masterpiece of pointillism. It does need to be experience in reality, since reproductions lose the whole point – pardon the pun. Of course, Laura claims that this is a copy, anyway.

Now, onto Nighthawks and American Gothic. Apparently they are in rooms directly connected to each other. Good. How do we get to them. Ah ha! They are on the second floor. Logical would tell us that we need to take the stairs to the second floor and then we would have access to the entire second floor. But logic does not live in the Art Institute of Chicago. Let’s wander around on the second floor for awhile, before realizing we can’t get to the paintings on the second floor we actually want to see. We must now go down to the first floor, travel to the other end of the building (and notably through a gift shop) before reaching another staircase that leads us up to the other side of the second floor. No! Not that staircase. If you take that one the whole mess will start again. We must take the staircase directly behind that staircase. Yes. They are just a few feet from each other. Goody. Ok. We’ve made it. There it is. Nighthawks. The real one, Laura. (And certainly not that bizarre reproduction with Marilyn Monroe and James Dean. Whose idea was that anyway?) Ok. Move on. American Gothic, in all it’s splendor. We did it! We did it! We all survived to see it. Something else weird about the Art Institute – they let you take pictures of the artwork, which is usually taboo. So we took a picture to commemorate our great victory. You’re not allowed to smile while taking a picture with American Gothic. I watched people. Nobody did. Everyone wants to look like the grumpy farmer guy.

I leave with a final warning to all you art museum architects out there: We really do want to see this artwork. Why do you make it so hard? I think I see what you’re doing. You think that you need to trick us into wandering around so we’ll look at the rest of the art too, don’t you? You don’t need to do that. We’ll look. We promise. But we get so frustrated looking for the famous pieces that we don’t enjoy anything. Oh yeah. And how about putting in some more bathrooms for my wife?

P.S. FROM LAURA:

Art museums are fairly uninteresting, and when you have to waddle three flights of stairs just to find the restrooms—only to discover that the women’s restrooms are actually on the OTHER side of the large stairway---they become even more uninteresting and actually slightly hellish. (Now why can’t I use the men’s?) Anyone who has been pregnant knows that though you have been to the restroom exactly ten minutes ago, you may suddenly and very urgently need to go again. So while I’m pregnant I judge a place also by its restrooms, and this place gets a huge thumbs-down in my opinion. Oh, and what did I think about the art? Canon. Extra Glossy. All the real ones are in Paris.

39. CHICAGO-STYLE PIZZA

Chicago, Illinois

4/8/2010

A short detour off of Michigan Avenue led us to the original Pizzeria Uno – originator of the deep-dish (aka Chicago-style) pizza. Opened in 1943, the founders have resisted the urge to renovate despite their success. On the one hand, it assures an authentic experience and a steadfastness that is commendable. On the other hand, it’s small. Very small. The greeters seemed overwhelmed by the sheer numbers of people. We were told we would have a half-hour wait, but since the pizza takes 45-minutes to make, they took our order when we came in so they could start baking it right away. On the surface – and probably most of the time – a pretty good system. However, after standing there for an hour in their microscopic lobby (luckily, Laura was able to grab a seat on a crowded bench) one of the greeters asked if we had been helped yet, since she noticed us standing there for awhile. After a lot of confusion, the greeter and another employee finally concluded that we had come in during a shift change and got lost in the shuffle. They found a reference in their computer to someone whose name was nothing like mine with the same order we made, so they guessed the greeter had inputted our name incorrectly. “That girl,” the greeter offered, “She doesn’t spell very well.” “Or listen,” her companion admitted.

Eventually, they led us to a table where our waiter came out. He wanted to know our name so they could match it up with the order. I explained to him that we didn’t have our name attached to our order because of the mix up, but I told him what we ordered. He told us he would have to check on that. This made no sense to me. Clearly, we had been seated by the greeters. What diabolic scheme did he think we were hatching in order to steal someone else’s medium pizza? I’m sure this has not been everyone’s experience, but there seemed to be a breakdown in communication between the employees of this place across the board.

Let’s talk about the pizza, though. It was not what we expected, but it was a pleasant surprise. We ordered the Numero Uno, which is their signature pie. It is a deep-dish pizza, but the depth was in the toppings, not the bread. It was truly like a pie. The ingredients were high-quality and it was one of the few pizzas I’ve ever eaten when I didn’t get that “Oh man… I just ate a bunch of pizza” feeling in my stomach afterwards.

Although the pizza was good, looking around both in the lobby and in the dining area, it was obvious that everyone there was a tourist like us, drawn in for the one-time experience. Mistakes happen in restaurants, so I don’t hold their mix-up too much against them. But even if things had gone more smoothly, one still has to go through quite a bit of discomfort before eating and then they kind of usher you out as quickly as possible to bring in the next people. I’d love to hear from a real Chicagoan who eats here regularly – if such a person really exists. I doubt it's worth it.

38. THE MAGNIFICENT MILE

Chicago, Illinois

4/8/2010

A short walk from the Millennium Park is the Chicago River – the one they dye green for St. Patrick’s Day. Across the river is a portion of North Michigan Avenue nicknamed “The Magnificent Mile” – so-called due to the concentration of architectural wonders and for its Mecca-like status as a high-end shopping district. My Y-chromosome prevented me from enjoying the stores too much, but I liked seeing the Wrigley Building and the Tribune Tower.

Since it was rather chilly, we spent most of our time in the Shops at North Bridge – everything is inside. Does the world really need an entire store dedicated to Hello Kitty merchandise? Apparently it does.

I won’t make fun too much. The five-year old boy in me did start drooling at the Lego store. How cool to see the entire Chicago skyline recreated by those little bricks!

P.S. FROM LAURA:

When I saw the Hello Kitty store, I thought of my sisters. Hello Kitty was a favorite growing up. It seems to be one of those fads that will never die. I wanted to get one for Daniel, but Oliver wouldn’t let me. So that picture is for my sisters.

37. MILLENNIUM PARK

Chicago, Illinois

4/8/2010

With my spring break coming to a close it was time to take another trip. This time, we decided to focus our attention on one city: Chicago. The six and a half hour drive was a pleasant one and I made sure to make Quantum Leap sound effects as we entered the central time zone.

Around 3 o’clock we reached Millennium Park – the newest addition to the Lake Michigan-bordering Grant Park. Since we were going to be doing a lot of walking this evening we were a little worried about the drizzly weather, but it wasn’t too bad. Millennium Park, as the name suggests, has kind of a sci-fi design. The centerpiece is a public-art piece called Cloud Gate – a huge, mirrored sculpture. Its nickname (to the chagrin of its designer) is “The Bean” – which gives you kind of an idea of what it looks like. Daniel is in his “obsessed with mirrors” phase, so this gigantic funhouse mirror was very exciting for him. Although I had seen pictures of the sculpture in advance, they don’t really do it justice. It really is expertly designed, as it reflects the entire Chicago-skyline in different ways depending on the point of view of the observer.

We explored the park for awhile, which has some other public-art pieces. There were some dinosaurs by Chinese artists (knowingly emblazed with “Made in China”) that seemed to be part of a travelling display, so I assume different sculptures are rotated from time to time. We really liked Crown Fountain, which are kind of these gargoyle spoofs. Fifty-foot towers of LED lights display moving human faces. In the “mouths” are spouts where water can spew. Unfortunately, the water wasn’t flowing when we visited, but we got the idea.

36. CLEVELAND MUSEUM OF ART & THE BOTANICAL GARDEN

Cleveland, Ohio

4/4/2010

Happy Easter! While visiting my family for the holiday, Laura, Daniel and I shot north of their house to visit the Cleveland Museum of Art and the Cleveland Botanical Gardens – which are two separate facilities, although Schultz groups them together. She does that sometimes, which I kind of find inconsistent. If its 1000 places to see, it should be 1000 places, cheater! It was no bother though, since both institutions are right across the street from each other and they are both worth seeing.

We started with the Cleveland Museum of Art – which a cheapskate like me remembered has free admission. As a former “Greater Cleveland” resident I have been there many times. I’m pretty sure we went there a bunch of times on field trips, plus I’d been there with buddies at least once or twice. Additionally, when I was running my production company we did a project in collaboration with the museum, so I spent a lot of time there then. My memories of the place were confirmed by this visit – it really is an excellent museum. What’s interesting about it is that it’s actually quite small. The museum spins what could be seen as a criticism in a way that I agree with – the limited exhibition space insures that the quality of each piece on display is very high. In other words, you can easily navigate through the museum in an hour or two and be assured that you are seeing the cream of the collection. Laura and I contrasted this museum to the Detroit Art Institute – huge, unwieldy, and ultimately a frustrating search for one or two famous pieces we could never find. We left the Cleveland Museum of Art very satisfied that we had seen it all. However, Laura kept insisting that everything in the museum were forgeries and the only real art in the world is in the Louvre. She hasn’t convinced me yet.

I have to make note that although Laura and I loved the museum, its biggest and newest fan is Daniel. He was absolutely enraptured by many of the paintings and sculptures. There was one piece in particular that he was completely hypnotized by when he first saw it. We passed by it again on our way back to the exit and he remembered it, pointing and babbling excitedly. It is a sculpture (I guess?) called Looking Along Broadway Towards Grace Church by Red Grooms. All you babies out there need to check it out.

Next, we went across the street to the Botanical Gardens. I had never been there before – probably because it costs money. Admission is $7.50, but you get a dollar off each ticket with AAA. They even gave us a dollar off Daniel’s free ticket, which I’ve never had happen before anywhere. In other words, instead of paying $15, we only paid $12. Additionally, if you are going to take advantage of the various museums on University Circle, park in the Botanical Gardens parking lot. If you visit the gardens you can pay a flat $5 parking fee and stay all day, otherwise you’ll be paying by the half-hour. Oh boy. I love being a cheapskate.

Anyway, onto the gardens themselves. The facility is in two parts – a series of glasshouses simulating the environments of Costa Rica and Madagascar (for drastic contrast), and a series of outdoor gardens. We started with the glasshouses. Our enjoyment of the many plants, birds, giant cockroaches (behind glass, thankfully), and exotic butterflies was amplified by Daniel’s utter amazement. We spent a lot of time stalking butterflies and watching them flutter from tree to tree. He was especially fascinated by a pretty powerful waterfall.

After we finished with the glasshouses we went outside to look at the various outdoor gardens which make up the majority of the grounds. Unfortunately, it’s a little too early in the spring for too many of the gardens to be in full bloom, but it was still a nice walk in a really nicely manicured space. One of the highlights of the gardens is the Hershey Children’s Garden – which I think is named in honor of a Cleveland family and is no relation to the chocolate people, as far as I could make out. Even though we had dressed Daniel up to look nice for Easter dinner, we couldn’t deny him the chance to crawl around and explore. It was here that Daniel encountered his first bully. Cue dramatic music.

Let us set the scene. In one corner of the Children’s Garden is a sandbox. A two-year old boy was playing with two dump trucks just off to the side of the sandbox. Daniel was sitting there and I could tell he wanted one of the trucks as he stared longingly at them, but the two-year old was already playing with them. Daniel was a good boy. He just watched as the other boy played. Eventually, the two-year old got bored with the trucks, left them, and went off to play somewhere else. Once the boy was gone, Daniel started to play with one of the trucks. Of course, as soon as the two-year old saw Daniel take one of the trucks he returned and took both of the trucks away from him. Satan’s mother was sitting on a bench watching the proceedings and she decided to help the situation by saying, “Lucifer, don’t make the baby cry.” Damien said nothing, but made an angry face at Daniel and held firmly to the trucks. Daniel had this very confused, “Did I do something wrong?” look on his face. Then Rosemary said to her baby, “Why don’t you find another truck for the baby somewhere else?” Little Beelzebub pulled the trucks further away from Daniel. Daniel continued to stare with this sad, confused look on his face. Laura asked Mommy Dearest, “Do those trucks belong to your son?” “No,” the Queen of the Damned replied. Fed up, I sat down next to the jackal and said quietly, “I’m going to take one of these trucks now. I know you won’t mind. It’s very nice of you to share with me.” The spawn said nothing, but just stared at me with an extremely angry look on his face. Daniel now had a truck and began to play with it. Azrael stormed away from the sandbox, grabbed Daniel’s stroller and suddenly tried to take it! Laura had to hold on to it and slightly struggle with this little devil to stop him from knocking it over. All through this the mom just sits on her bench and says nothing at all. Eventually, mother and son returned to the pit from whence they came to torment someone else. My opinion of parents who let their children run amok while vainly croaking out “Now, be nice” probably requires no additional commentary.

After that little altercation, Daniel had a lot of fun playing in the sand. We were very proud of how he handled himself. Plus, Laura and I were both amazed that he didn’t try to eat any of the sand. Our little boy is growing up.